Have you ever wondered how apparent failure can sometimes be liberating? It makes you sit back and wonder what you were chasing in the first place. It fills you with a cold anger, and recharges you for the next surge. And this time, maybe you learn to adapt, to not rush headlong, or simply to be patient. And not let the outcome of something be the sole determinator or reflection of your life.
Sometimes, I feel like all of us are suffering from some neurosis, from which there is no relief. My first recollections of political conciousness are those of a need for more justice and equity. Growing up in a bipolar township where from a very early age servant quarter’s and “outhouses” gave us, the blessed ones, windows into the other India, I grew increasingly angry about the disadvantages some individuals start out with and the vectors thier lives take as a result. Some of the boys I have played with, some of the daughters who worked part time in our house.
But the world isn’t Gotham City, and my naive reductions of crime & deviance being either a result of economic and social disadvantages or childhood abuse have not endured. I am now mostly left dazed. By the sheer ferocity and complexity of the issues the world faces today.
I feel it is all going to implode very soon, and the cacaphony of jingoistic and alarmist media all around doesn’t help. I don’t even know what exapmle to cite or what to talk about anymore.
The world has gone mad. And there are no saving graces, except individual lives and joys, escapes into children, films about love and longing, or books about God.